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Joke of the Day (Warning some jokes may cause laughter)!!! : )
- Thread starter pigoo3
- Start date
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No way Patrick, that is 2 meters together mate, or at least in close formation.
Also, they are working the open door policy init mate
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No, I changed my mind. It's a lesser spotted horned blind bat. Of course it is I should have realised that before, just look at those wings and it's obviously blind.
What ever you do don't have any soup made from it or you'll get Tizervirus, or Tizwas19 as it's scientifilakie known.
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- Born Scotland. Worked all over UK. Live in Wales
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- - - Updated - - -
- Joined
- Jul 21, 2016
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- Derby England.
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An eight year old was flashing a new watch and his best mate asked how he had come by it. Oh simple he said, I caught my mum and dad at 'it' in their bedroom and dad got me the watch to bribe me to keep quiet. His mate went home and stayed awake until his mum and dad were at 'it' then burst into their room. His dad saw him and asked what do you want? he replied "I want a watch" To that his dad said "OK but close the door there is a **** of a draught round my bum".
Keith in Derby.
Keith in Derby.
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Definition of:-
The world's perfect lover? A man with a nine inch tongue who can breath through his ears!
A fancy man? He who has been circumcised with a pair of pinking shears!
Keith in Derby.
The world's perfect lover? A man with a nine inch tongue who can breath through his ears!
A fancy man? He who has been circumcised with a pair of pinking shears!
Keith in Derby.
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a few more alternate meanings
iMac. - burger for Arabic eating houses specialising in lamb parts
MacBook. - List of Scottish peers and Lairds
iPad. - options
iWatch. - wish of young boy who wanted to see what his parents did when he was asleep.
iMac. - burger for Arabic eating houses specialising in lamb parts
MacBook. - List of Scottish peers and Lairds
iPad. - options
iWatch. - wish of young boy who wanted to see what his parents did when he was asleep.
- Joined
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Now, everyone is looking out to protect everyone else now that the tensions are really building... 
- Patrick
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- Patrick
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- Joined
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- Location
- Sacramento, California
- Joined
- Feb 1, 2011
- Messages
- 4,904
- Reaction score
- 2,908
- Points
- 113
- Location
- Sacramento, California
- Joined
- Sep 30, 2007
- Messages
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- Location
- The Republic of Neptune
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(outdated link removed)
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Who's this Captain of Titanic –
Here are his announcements:
There isn't any iceberg
There was an iceberg but it's in a totally different ocean
The iceberg is in this ocean but it will melt very soon
There is an iceberg but we didn't hit the iceberg
We hit the iceberg, but the damage will be repaired very shortly
The iceberg is a Chinese iceberg
We are taking on water but every passenger who wants a lifeboat can get a lifeboat, and they are beautiful lifeboat
Look, passengers need to ask nicely for the lifeboats if they want them
We don't have any lifeboats, we're not lifeboat distributors
Passengers should have planned for icebergs and brought their own lifeboats
I really don't think we need that many lifeboats
We have lifeboats and they're supposed to be our lifeboats, not the passengers' lifeboats
The lifeboats were left on shore by the last captain of this ship
Nobody could have foreseen the iceberg
I'm an expert on icebergs I've got lots of friends who deal with icebergs. Some of the best. Really good ice people who know ice and their forms of berginess
- DJTrump.
Here are his announcements:
There isn't any iceberg
There was an iceberg but it's in a totally different ocean
The iceberg is in this ocean but it will melt very soon
There is an iceberg but we didn't hit the iceberg
We hit the iceberg, but the damage will be repaired very shortly
The iceberg is a Chinese iceberg
We are taking on water but every passenger who wants a lifeboat can get a lifeboat, and they are beautiful lifeboat
Look, passengers need to ask nicely for the lifeboats if they want them
We don't have any lifeboats, we're not lifeboat distributors
Passengers should have planned for icebergs and brought their own lifeboats
I really don't think we need that many lifeboats
We have lifeboats and they're supposed to be our lifeboats, not the passengers' lifeboats
The lifeboats were left on shore by the last captain of this ship
Nobody could have foreseen the iceberg
I'm an expert on icebergs I've got lots of friends who deal with icebergs. Some of the best. Really good ice people who know ice and their forms of berginess
- DJTrump.
- Joined
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Bob! That is totally stupid mate and probably true too. After all He has friends in all areas, very, very, very good friends. And very truthful friends. Init?
- Joined
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Why do so many of those friends keep hovering so closely round him at the pedestal when he is giving his speeches???
- Patrick
======
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