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Joke of the Day (Warning some jokes may cause laughter)!!! : )

Slydude

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I was going to provide the same service for $15.00 but the Nigerian Prince leading my team just quit. So I guess your revenue stream is safe for now.
 
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After moving to the U.S., a Chinese doctor struggled to find work in a hospital. So, he opened a small clinic with a clever sign out front:
“Treatment for $20 — If not cured, get $100 back!”

One day, an American lawyer saw the sign and thought, “What a scam… but hey, easy money!” He walked in confidently.
Lawyer: “Doctor, I’ve lost my sense of taste.”
Doctor: “Nurse, bring medicine from Box No. 22. Three drops in his mouth.”
Lawyer: “Bleh! That’s kerosene!”
Doctor: “Congratulations — your taste is back. That’ll be $20.”

Annoyed but determined, the lawyer returned a few days later.
Lawyer: “I’ve lost my memory. I can’t remember anything.”
Doctor: “Nurse, Box No. 22 again. Three drops.”
Lawyer: “Wait! That’s kerosene again!”
Doctor: “Wonderful — your memory’s back! That’ll be $20.”

Now thoroughly frustrated, the lawyer made one last attempt to win.
Lawyer: “My eyesight is failing. I can’t see a thing!”
Doctor: “I’m sorry. I don’t have a cure for that. Here’s your $100.”
The doctor handed him a $20 bill.
Lawyer (squinting): “Hey, wait a minute… this is just $20!”
Doctor: “Fantastic! Your eyesight is restored. That’ll be $20.”
 
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A State Trooper pulled a car over for speeding. When he asked the driver why he was in such a hurry, the man explained he was a juggler on his way to perform at the Shrine Circus and didn’t want to be late.

The trooper said, "I've always been fascinated by juggling. If you put on a little show for me, I'll let you off with just a warning."

The juggler got out, lit four torches, and began juggling right there on the side of the road.

While he was performing, another car pulled up behind the police cruiser. A drunk guy stumbled out, walked straight over to the patrol car, opened the back door, and climbed in.

The trooper went over, opened the door, and asked, "What do you think you're doing?"

The drunk replied, "You might as well take me to jail now, ‘cause there’s no way I’m passing that test!"

-Lisa
 

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