What's your favorite Windows error message?

[Cassifire]

I got this in XP once.

"This program does not support this type of file. You can abort, or try to open the file, which will cause your computer to crash.

What do you want to do?"


...What do you think?!

Although not as funny, I was lucky enough to get a screenshot of this one, before abesently clicking OK.

Mind you, I don't take screenshots of every error message, this one just caught my eye for some reason.(It was that last line that made me laugh for some reason...I guess you had to be there

 

[dtravis7]

i remember seeing this message on a school computer once...

Keyboard not found, press any key to continue

How do i do that???

I have seen that many times especially on older PC's. Agreed, how do you press a key? There ARE NO KEYS!! :spook:

 

[TheThirdMan]

I think the old "You performed an illegal operation" were pretty good, but my favourite has to be the "end programme" message which comes up when you shut down and some programs still havent closed down properly. I always end up shouting at the screen:
"YES CLOSE THE PROGRAM!, THATS THE POINT OF SHUTTING DOWN!!! WHY ARE YOU EVEN ASKING ME THIS!!!! YOU CANT EVEN RUN PROGRAMS WHEN A COMPUTER IS SHUT DOWN!!!!! WHY WOULD I WANT TO KEEP A PROGRAM RUNNING WHEN IM SHUTTING DOWN!!!!!!????/"

Windows is so stupid.

And of course the error in memory address x186cc9x60796078x609712y21076. So im now supposed to open up my ram and using an atom-microscope figure out where that address is in the ram, figure out what its set to, learn all of the windows code and then figure out what caused it and how to rectify it. OR they could have just had a proper error-message system, such as "this program has crashed because of x & y" then i could fix the problem.

And then windows asks you to spend time sending THEM an error report. Great.

 

[mikeyman]

that "windows has performed an illegal operation" line scared when i was younger i thought i was going to have the police come round or something.

 

[walmartconnect]

A new security system was put onto our network that doesn't let you access the internet unless you have an antivirus installed and all critical windows updates downloaded.

This forced me to download the one "critical" update that I tend to ignore: Internet Explorer 7.
^ Of course this meant that I had to restart my computer. After restarting, the security software again told me that I couldn't use the internet because of "CRITICAL WINDOWS UPDATES." I thought, "What updates? I just downloaded the only one." Ta da! There's like 4 critical updates for Internet Explorer!

 

[Number6]

One of my favorites has always been (paraphrasing):

Internal error at 0000000x5cde; the file could not be "read".

Yes the quotation marks are intentional. Just what I need; my Windows machine throwing air-quotes at me. Of course, since Microsoft always has its own proprietery implementation of everything (including Kerberos, for pity's sake), it's no wonder Windows seems to have its own proprietery way to "read" a file.

 

[TheCustomer99]

A new security system was put onto our network that doesn't let you access the internet unless you have an antivirus installed and all critical windows updates downloaded.

This forced me to download the one "critical" update that I tend to ignore: Internet Explorer 7.
^ Of course this meant that I had to restart my computer. After restarting, the security software again told me that I couldn't use the internet because of "CRITICAL WINDOWS UPDATES." I thought, "What updates? I just downloaded the only one." Ta da! There's like 4 critical updates for Internet Explorer!

This begs me to ask the question. If the updates to IE 7 were so "critical", then why weren't they updated into your initial download? It seems that the Microsoft folks want to annoy you.

 

[cwa107]

"Would you like to report this problem to Microsoft...blah, blah, blah. We won't be able to do anything about it but it will help us....."

Can you imagine how many bajillions of reports are actually sent to Microsoft on a daily basis? I mean, seriously, does anyone think (or did Microsoft once think) that someone would actually even look at a fraction of these things and attempt to decipher them? I'd love to meet the genius that thought that this would be a beneficial feature to ANYONE.

 

[HKphotographer]

the illegal operation thing is very funny, but what it means by 'illegal' is actually against operation rules I suppose

 

[eric]

 

[MartinS]

I always loved: A fatal exception has occurred.

Although my mom once asking me whether "you are about to save changes to the global template" meant she would affect all the computers in the world is a close second.

 

[TheCustomer99]

I'd click 'yes' and go out and buy a Mac.

 

[Amen-Moses]

I like the one that tells me I've just plugged a USB 2 device into a USB 1 port and then suggests I plug it into a USB 2 port when I don't have any! Would it be beyond the abilities of the OS to actually check if I have any first?

Amen-Moses

 

[stevenyc]

Can you imagine how many bajillions of reports are actually sent to Microsoft on a daily basis? I mean, seriously, does anyone think (or did Microsoft once think) that someone would actually even look at a fraction of these things and attempt to decipher them? I'd love to meet the genius that thought that this would be a beneficial feature to ANYONE.

Several times I've used this feature and received a link to a solution that fixed the problem right away, something I've never been able to do when a program on a Mac "unexpectedly quits" because of an "unknown error". This whole thread makes me laugh b/c one of my biggest complaints about a Mac is the vauge error messages. I'd type more but I have to go help a Mac user whose Illustrator keeps quitting. No error messages, it's just quitting. Wish me luck.

 

[TheThirdMan]

I know what you mean, but it tends to be the program rather than the OS in my experience.

 

[christm]

the illegal operation one is pretty weird lol.

my favorite is probs (or most hated) - would you like to send an error report ?

i mean they must get millions of them and how can they ever use them !

 

[christm]

I'd click 'yes' and go out and buy a Mac.

haha i would to :black:

 

[Stretch]

the illegal operation one is pretty weird lol.

my favorite is probs (or most hated) - would you like to send an error report ?

i mean they must get millions of them and how can they ever use them !

They don't, that's why not much is ever fixed in Windows.

 

[Subwall]

yesterday a friend called me to come look at her computer because she thought it was broken. I got there and turned it on, before windows booted i got this:

Cannot boot Windows because the following file is either missing or corrupted.

/windows/system32/system/[some inane but important system file]

Please insert your Windows XP installation disc and press 'R' to repair this problem.


My friend asked "Is that bad?"
I couldn't help but laugh.

 

[plusfortyfour]

I only got the Program performed an illegal operation and Program not responding.

The worst is when you click end program atleast 20 times and the bleeping thing wouldn't close.