Using the word "Gay" as a negative adjective.

[schweb]

I love how some people justify their prejudice and bigotry. It makes me all warm inside.

 

[The Vindicat3d]

Yes the word has many different forms. Yes people can and will be mean and that's just something you are going to have to deal with. Yes some people may not be offended by it... but I am talking about the derogatory form, I am saying that people should react and not just let it happen, there have been many incidents of homosexuals committing suicide, due to stress and directed hatred, many homosexuals in my town are very offended by it and I'm sure it does not help them in any way with all the stress and hatred they already have to deal with. I'm not all bent out of shape about it but why let someone be hurt and offended when it can be prevented, should you just let someone talk smack to one of your friends? No. It's the same ordeal in a way and with a much larger group of people. Sorry if some of the things I stated were a bit strong I am just trying to get my point across.

(I am not gay by the way, if anyone thought that that was why I was getting "all worked up" about this.)

 

[DocZ06]

Yes some people may not be offended by it... but I am talking about the derogatory form, I am saying that people should react and not just let it happen, there have been many incidents of homosexuals committing suicide, due to stress and directed hatred, many homosexuals in my town are very offended by it and I'm sure it does not help them in any way with all the stress and hatred they already have to deal with.

You are misinformed my friend. As a "straight male" (fwiw), medical professional, those people (and other's who commit suicide) had more serious personal issues going on than you're implying.

 

[The Vindicat3d]

Oh I'm sure they did, I'm just saying that I am sure that that sort of hatred and attacks most certainly do not help. Sorry if I came of wrong, and I was most likely misinformed by the news and the papers that I read. They always like to center on certain information of an event or "stretch" the truth.

 

[WakeCarver]

I know some black people who use the "n-word" all the time. What's your point again?

My point was that not everyone that uses gay in a derogatory way means it as an insult to gay people. I know some people do and that is unfortunate but that is the society we live in. Until people quit being closed minded about other peoples lifestyles I guess problems like this will never go away. Also i think the "n-word" is a whole other issue and should never be used. Just my thoughts.

 

[mathogre]

Earlier in the day I saw the thread and my reaction was, "Oh no, not again."

You know, hate's easy to start. It doesn't have to sound like hate, except it always does. And then it grows in bits and pieces, but just little bits and pieces that you know, they really don't matter. But then they do. Really though, it doesn't matter because we're smarter than that. Really. But we're consumed anyway and we start reflecting to others what we are, and if we're role models it's worse because others think it's the right way to be. You sow the seed in others without even knowing, and you'll never know what comes of it, except when you see something on the 6 o'clock news or on Google news or in the paper, and someone's dead. Beaten, kicked, shot. Maybe it was a gay man, or a lesbian. Maybe it was a transgendered person, or someone who is bisexual.

Hate's easy. It's like fire. It's easy to start, and it spreads quickly. I've watched it. "That's so gay" is a match you don't want to light.

 

[mojonandha]

I hear this every single day and i agree with the OP.

Even Chris Crocker made a video abt this

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TdgpgRgwM8c

I think he is very funny and i enjoy most of his videos.

 

[dfb]

I am not a Politically Correct person... I don't care, nor is it any of my business on an individuals Orientation.. some wear it like a badge of honor.. It has no place in the work place, nor a day of celebration, after all, we don't have a STRAIGHT DAY!!! Next time at my place of employment when this gets addressed as COVERAGE, I will kindly say, "Boss, this OFFENDS ME!!! It is against my religion, it has no place in the workplace, and I will get an attorney if I am forced to agree with YOUR policies of non discrimination or listen to this garbage...

 

[baggss]

I love how some people justify their prejudice and bigotry. It makes me all warm inside.

I'm curious as to what you mean by that. It comes across as anyone who disagrees with you must therefore a bigot and quite condescending. I'm assuming it was not intended as such.

You know, hate's easy to start. It doesn't have to sound like hate, except it always does. And then it grows in bits and pieces, but just little bits and pieces that you know, they really don't matter. But then they do. Really though, it doesn't matter because we're smarter than that. Really. But we're consumed anyway and we start reflecting to others what we are, and if we're role models it's worse because others think it's the right way to be. You sow the seed in others without even knowing, and you'll never know what comes of it, except when you see something on the 6 o'clock news or on Google news or in the paper, and someone's dead. Beaten, kicked, shot. Maybe it was a gay man, or a lesbian. Maybe it was a transgendered person, or someone who is bisexual.

Hate's easy. It's like fire. It's easy to start, and it spreads quickly. I've watched it. "That's so gay" is a match you don't want to light.

I actually disagree with pretty much everything you just said. Words only have the power that we choose to give them.

 

[leecho7]

I actually disagree with pretty much everything you just said. Words only have the power that we choose to give them.

I agree with you baggss. But I also agree with Mathogre. The reason why words can ignite hatred and spread it around like fire is because people do place power behind words. I mean words are a means for us to communicate. So we communicate our hatreds, our joys, our emotions, feelings and thoughts, through words.

i know there's the saying, 'sticks and stones will break my bones, but names will never hurt me.'

The reality is, words and names do hurt if they a derogatory. There will always be power given to derogatory words from both the speaker, and the recipient.

 

[baggss]

The reality is, words and names do hurt if they a derogatory. There will always be power given to derogatory words from both the speaker, and the recipient.

They are only derogatory if we take them as such. As was noted earlier, gay people would not likely be as offended if they didn't have other issues going on at the same time. If someone calls me gay, even a stranger, I don't care since I know that I am not and am comfortable with my sexuality. The same goes with the term "White Trash", "Redneck" "Pollock" (I am Polish), "Fat-A**", "Republican", "Conservative" and a host of other supposedly "Derogatory" terms that could be applied to me in general or specific.

Many of those who are offended by such words are those who are unsure about themselves or uncomfortable with their lives. If one can get past that then the words cease to have any real negative meaning. I call my friend the N-word often as do other friends of his. He is past the negative meaning of the word in most cases. My wifes boss uses the term "gay" to refer to himself and his sexuality as well as to things he finds stupid.

In the end we have really put to much emphasis on what one can not say only because we allow a minority to dictate that certain words are hateful.

This whole conversation reminds me of Clerks II and the "Porch Monkey" scenes....

 

[WakeCarver]

This whole conversation reminds me of Clerks II and the "Porch Monkey" scenes....

LOL, agreed!

 

[leecho7]

Haha, agreed baggss. You're just like me when it comes to derogatory words. If someone calls me (insert derogatory term here), I usually don't care.

However, that can't be applied to all situations.
My bro was just released from the joint back in October. He said the last thing you want to have happen, is have someone label you as a (derogatory term for female dog).
In the reality of his situation, this term literally took lives. You're likelihood of survival depended on not being labeled as something.

Even today, people are still very sensitive about certain terms. That is why politicians have to be very careful with what they say to the public.

I have a Vietnamese friend who is gay. He couldn't care less if you use that term derogatorily towards him or in general. But the moment you called him a gook, he would've gone totally insane on you. Could that be because he is insecure about his own culture?
I'm not expecting an answer. It's more of a hypothetical.

I mean, I think the world would be a better place if all of us didn't take derogatory terms so seriously. But unfortunately, that just isn't the case.

 

[baggss]

1) Your brothers case is far from the norm and not a good example. He was literally in a life or death situation.

2) Yes, your friend IS insecure about his culture and is likely trying to distance himself from choices that other, more famous, Vietnamese have made that impacted the entire group.

3) To be honest, we expect WAY to much from politicians these days. Considering the poor lot of people we have to choose from the best we should hope for as ones who are not openly stealing from the public.

4) The world might be a better place if we all just got over ourselves, and our sense of hyped up self importance, and realized that we are all humans no matter what the different physical and cultural differences may be. As cynical as it sounds, human life is cheap and we prove it every single day all around the world.

 

[leecho7]

Those are valid points baggss, and I agree with you on most of them. I know my brother's case is an extreme, but he would argue that it is like that in the 'streets' as well. Now that could be more of an insecurity issue, as you mentioned.

But as for my Vietnamese friend, I'm not sure if I would really use the term insecure.
My parents are strong Korean-Americans (they just got their citizenship not too long ago), who take great pride in their Korean culture and heritage.
If someone mistakes them for being Japanese or Chinese, they would make sure that the person knew they were Korean.
Maybe pride is a more suitable term. Or maybe in reality, if we look real deep into it, the very fundamentals of pride can be traced back to insecurity, which gives your arguments more validity...?
Did I just contradict myself?

Well anyway, to get back on topic, as long as words are used to express ideas, emotions, and feelings, people will be inspired or offended by them.


... why is it that I can spend time writing on these forums, and have actually something to write about... but can't get motivated enough to start my list of papers due by the end of next week for school?

 

[baggss]

I agree with the pride possibility. I personally am able to differentiate between Asian races visually but I know many folks can't.

You can spend time here because we are FUN!

 

[cheetahastra]

I'm gay and hear people using the word gay like that a fair bit - i've grown to just ignore it - it used to offend me at first. But as you say it's really just slang.

 

[jah]

there is possibly 2 spellings:
"gay" //sexual orientation.
"ghay" //use this word to describe an over done and or useless.

 

[schweb]

there is possibly 2 spellings:
"gay" //sexual orientation.
"ghay" //use this word to describe an over done and or useless.

um, ok.

 

[milessthomas]

Its ignorant to assume that everyone you hear use the word gay, means it in a derogatory sense towards homosexuals.

One of my best friends is gay and like others have said, he uses the word gay to describe things frequently. I'm sure that there are some people that use it in a derogative sense, but not everyone does. I would assume most people use the word without thinking twice about the meaning it could entail. Personally it doesn't bother me that people use gay to describe an event or object.