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Type: Posts; User: sllewk

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  1. Yesterday my wife purchased a new very trendy...

    Yesterday my wife purchased a new very trendy outfit and this morning she tried it on! She asked my opinion and I asked would she prefer the honest one or the one she wanted to hear. She said with...
  2. Mick and Paddy were outside the site foreman's...

    Mick and Paddy were outside the site foreman's hut waiting for an interview, Paddy was very nervous and asked Mick to go in first then he would have a clue as to what the questions were like. Mick...
  3. Albert and George at the Old Folks Home were...

    Albert and George at the Old Folks Home were chatting and George said " Do you remember that stuff they used to put in your tea whilst in the Army?" "Yes I do " said Albert "and I will tell you here...
  4. Paddy and Jock had been set on by the...

    Paddy and Jock had been set on by the telecommunications company to plant telegraph poles, the foreman sent the off in separate directions and told to return at 17.00hrs. At the arranged time they...
  5. Albert and George were sitting on a seat in the...

    Albert and George were sitting on a seat in the Old Folk's Home garden when Gladys, Who was celebrating her 100th birthday, decided to streak across the lawn as a celebration. She removed all her...
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    Hello everybody, my interpretation is this;...

    Hello everybody, my interpretation is this; some-one has managed to enter his photos and basically steal them but how or even why is beyond my comprehension.
    Best regards from Keith in Derby England.
  7. Importing Google Photos.

    Good morning everyone, as you will know from my last serious post my MacBook Pro died and I now have a MacBook Air A1466 running Catalina (not sure of the pedigree or the year yet). As the other...
  8. Statement:- Barbie doll has never had a baby...

    Statement:- Barbie doll has never had a baby because Ken always comes in a different box.

    That will be edited out for sure?

    Keith in Derby.
  9. Definition of:- The world's perfect lover? A...

    Definition of:-

    The world's perfect lover? A man with a nine inch tongue who can breath through his ears!

    A fancy man? He who has been circumcised with a pair of pinking shears!

    Keith in...
  10. An eight year old was flashing a new watch and...

    An eight year old was flashing a new watch and his best mate asked how he had come by it. Oh simple he said, I caught my mum and dad at 'it' in their bedroom and dad got me the watch to bribe me to...
  11. Hi, It is an ADAPTORPLASTERCROCOPOTAMUS I think?...

    Hi, It is an ADAPTORPLASTERCROCOPOTAMUS I think?

    Keith in Derby.
  12. Hi, here is a reproduction of a sign on a local...

    Hi, here is a reproduction of a sign on a local shop door :- SEMI-AUTOMATIC DOOR PLEASE PUSH.
    IF THAT DOES...
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    Good morning Slydude, Never have wasted time; it...

    Good morning Slydude, Never have wasted time; it is a very precious commodity indeed.

    Very best regards from Keith in Derby.
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    Good morning Jake, you have hit the nail on the...

    Good morning Jake, you have hit the nail on the head there, she is most certainly a KEEPER! On May 12 we celebrate our 44th anniversary but sadly due to the dreaded lurgy we are in a 'lock down...
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    Hi Jake and Bob, I thank you both for your...

    Hi Jake and Bob, I thank you both for your replies. My dear lady wife has suggested a replacement!!! Wow what a marvellous wife I have, so I will look out for something a little newer. Thank you.
    ...
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    Late 2011 MacBook Pro - ruined!

    Good afternoon everyone, I foolishly loaned my MacBook Pro to my learned grand daughter ( I say 'learned' as she attends a local University). It is a 13 inch A1278 model running El Capitan, or I...
  17. An old man at the Doctor's reception desk and was...

    An old man at the Doctor's reception desk and was asked "Why are you here?". "There is something wrong with my ****!" "Oh you dirty old man, go outside and think of something more suitable" This he...
  18. Ashwin, sorry but I am now completely lost,...

    Ashwin, sorry but I am now completely lost, muddying the waters is a gross understatement. Best left to struggle I feel!!! On reflection though I will attempt to leave Yahoo as a search engine and...
  19. Ashwin, to me it is a long complicated story!...

    Ashwin, to me it is a long complicated story! First I do not know what you mean"Wedded to Yahoo"? Nearly all my email contacts are on yahoo where we have two different addresses; all our dealings and...
  20. Hello Ashwin, The word does change because it now...

    Hello Ashwin, The word does change because it now reads 'ISA Deadline' in Yahoo but still 'Laptops' on Firefox and yes it does disappear as soon as I start to type. Thank you for your reply, I have...
  21. Word permanently in the search engine box.

    Good afternoon, today I have noticed the word laptops in lowercase letters in my search engine box, the cursor is in front of the 'L' and the whole word disappears once I type a letter in the box. My...
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    Many thanks to all who have taken the trouble to...

    Many thanks to all who have taken the trouble to reply to my best wishes. I too am a person of high risk, I suffer from Chronic Lymphacitic Leukemia, (among other maladies), whilst not life...
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    Coronavirus.

    Good morning America, It is with a heavy heart that I hope not too many of our illustrious members end up with the dreaded lurgy. Mavis and I are both OK thanks but under a strict curfew of not going...
  24. Good morning all, All this is way above my...

    Good morning all, All this is way above my head!!! I am very pleased that I will not be purchasing a new machine in the near future (if at all at my age) there seems to be too many ifs and buts...
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    Jake, good morning> Please allow me to have a wee...

    Jake, good morning> Please allow me to have a wee bit of fun:- 24/7. I will analyse those figures, first 24, that makes me think of hours in one day. We will remember that fact. Now we look at 7,...
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