Is there a way to see if a gifted gift card has been used?

I sent a $100 iTunes card (physical item; yes I know it's available in a virtual form) to my niece for her wedding, but have not heard a word of acknowledgment from her. We are not especially close, so it's not as if I could ask her about it without things being awkward.

My mother, who's 90, says that's how it is these days, and I should get with the times (that is, "the new normal", and not to expect thanks).

So, as I have all the numbers from the card on the Walmart receipt, can I somehow trace it?

Lastly, is my mother right about kids these days?

dotdotdot said:

My mother, who's 90, says that's how it is these days, and I should get with the times (that is, "the new normal", and not to expect thanks).

Lastly, is my mother right about kids these days?

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Not to be critical of your mother (or her age)...but many folks as they get older (many times) will gravitate towards the negative. How many times to you hear older folks say:

- "I remember when a loaf of bread cost 10 cents."
- "Ahh...the good old days."
- "When I was growing up...."
- etc. etc.

FYI...I've been hearing "older folks" for the past 40+ years saying exactly what your mother said. Older generations almost always feel like the younger generations don't do this or don't do that. And this sort of "generation gap" will continue well into the future.

This can happen at almost any age 20's, 30's, 40's, 50's, etc. Just depends on the topic area.

As far as is your mother right about your neice. Two things:

1. I totally think that it depends on the person who was given the gift. There are lots & lots of ways to say "thank's". Many more than were available 20 year's ago:

- old school "snail-mail"
- email
- Facebook
- phone call
- etc.

2. You mentioned not being on very good terms with your neice. This probably goes both ways...maybe she's uncomfortable saying thank you to you. But like I mentioned...with the internet...there are lot's of ways for her to say thanks without speaking with you directly (or even via snail mail).

Plus...did you attend your neice's wedding? I know I know...there are a hundred reasons why you may not have been able to attend the wedding (many I'm sure are totally legitimate). But if your neice is/was a "bridezilla"...the logical reasons you may have may not matter.

As far as the gift card...I'm not sure. My gut feeling is you can't track it (but I could be wrong). If your main concern is whether she actually received the card or not (more important than her saying thanks for it). If you know her email address...send her an email & ask her).

Or ask someone else that you can communicate with more easily to ask her.

- Nick

p.s. I'm not a "young pup" either!

FYI...I attended my neice's wedding back in April (she's 28)...and she said thank you to me for my wedding gift to her via Skype!

- Nick

I guess there's two things here. The first is to see if your niece got the card and used it. To that, I say who cares? You gave it as a gift, whether it gets used or not shouldn't matter to you. You've paid for it and it now belongs to someone else..

The second part is more the gratitude of having received the gift. I imagine that protocol requires that everyone that attends a wedding or gives a gift to the wedding party receives a thank you note, be it generic or specific. If you did receive that, perhaps your niece considers the gift thanked for..

No, you can't track if the card has been used.

Your niece should have thanked everyone who gave her a gift, simple courtesy. I think most brides would pride themselves on doing so, so no I don't agree that it is "kids these days."

pigoo3 said:

Not to be critical of your mother (or her age)...but many folks as they get older (many times) will gravitate towards the negative.



2. You mentioned not being on very good terms with your neice. This probably goes both ways...maybe she's uncomfortable saying thank you to you.

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LOL, I am the negative old crank here stuck in the old days and ways, not my mother even though she's 90.

Point #2 is brilliant. I'm going to go with that.

chas_m said:

No, you can't track if the card has been used.

Your niece should have thanked everyone who gave her a gift, simple courtesy. I think most brides would pride themselves on doing so, so no I don't agree that it is "kids these days."

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I agree about the 'thank you' (in whatever fashion) being a simple courtesy and the 'gift' should be acknowledged in some fashion. We attended a niece's wedding in May and received a thank you card for a cash gift - 'bride's etiquette' still suggests that 'thank you' notes (or other ways, I guess now w/ the internet) should be written w/i 3 months (Source). Dave