This thread is killing me, kinda like that itch you know you shouldn't scratch because it's only gonna make it worse, but....... I'm going to add a little twist, because I kinda like the pleasure of the pain
To the OP, in all of this "expectation", do you realise that the Mac Mini is the bottom end of the Mac line as far as modern Macs go?
To really get the most out of OS X, without even getting into the ways you can use OS X, such as all the Mac tutorials on the Apple site, the missing manual, and the list goes on, when you mix all the many ways you can go about so many tasks to suit the user, with the different variations of the Macs above and well beyond the Mac mini, there is a much greater experience than I think that you have ventured into.
Expectations are always going to disappoint at some level, but an open mind, and a willingness to learn and understand can really bring a lot of joy.
I think that you have been very quick to judge, and state your case, without even getting your toes wet!
Just an observation after reading and reading and reading post after post after post here!