I don't really understand why you want to "force" yourself into liking something when it appears you prefer the Incredible compared to the iPhone 4. Which is fine, being on a biased forum you are going to get a lot of Apple centric replies but I only own an iPhone 4. So I am by no means Apple entrenched and I'll try and give you some advice. Keep in mind I have never owned an Android phone before but have seen them in action.
The weather app doesn't find my location by GPS like the weather app on my droid. Now there may be one to download that does and if there is then let me know.
I am not sure about weather apps. I used MyCast Weather which is a nice full featured weather app but can't remember if I had to manually input my location. I know of some alarm apps that generate your location via GPS for weather information but again I can't say which of the weather apps do this.
I don't see any free navigation like my droid has. Google navigation.
MapQuest is free and is a decent navigation app for iOS but I can tell you right now there is nothing for iOS that compares to Googles Android maps offering. I have seen it and it is a killer app. You won't find anything like it on iOS, even with the expensive TomTom and Navigon apps.
When I loaded websites up both when the same amount of bars of 3G service the Android loaded the website much faster. The same with the same wifi.
3G has to do with carrier and location. AT&T in my experience has faster 3G data service than T-Mobile/Verizon/Sprint. AT&T has slow periods but overall the 3G service is good. As far as wifi I can't help you there. My iPhone 4 is on my home wifi network using broadband speeds and I get about 10.73 MB down and 2.5 MB up on very good days. It is pretty fast for my needs.
The text messages are in bubbles and I can only see so much without scrolling back up. The apps don't seem multi task as well as the android ones.
iOS does not use full multitasking like Android (which keeps the full app running in the background). iOS allows developers to use certain APIs for backgrounding but when you leave an app in iOS, if it doesn't use one of those allowed backgrounding APIs the app will just save its state (devs have to implement save state into apps) so when you return to the app, it starts right where you left it (again if the dev has updated their app for save state).
Also where was it that I'm not supposed to hold the phone while talking on the iphone 4 to damage the signal?
Bottom black strip on the side of the phone with the silent switch and volume + and - buttons. That lower corner will attenuate the signal if you touch it with skin.
Any cool FREE apps that might make me enjoy this phone more please point them in my direction.
Most of the apps I use are either the default Apple ones or paid for apps. Outside of the main free apps like Netflix, Facebook (which is head and shoulders better than the Android offering), Twitter there isn't many I can suggest outside of games.
Three games I play constantly are We Rule, We Farm, and Pocket Frogs.