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concerned father

D

deathdealler

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hey im using an i book with an os 9.2 system.

Anyway my daughter "14" is using yahoo mail for her email, and just changed her id last week, and in the last 2 weeks has ben acting really strange.
I am very worried about her don't know if its drugs or if it is that she has found some weirdo on line. I would like to find out what's going on before I approach her.

Anyway is there anyway I can find out what the password is to her email?
Is there any free spy ware that can record the keyes typed on the keyboard during that day or during the week?

thanks concerned father
 
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D

Desolate One

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A concerned father with the user name "deathdealler"? Something is certainly amiss here. Regardless, there are software and hardware options for your means. Google "keystroke recorder" and I'm sure you'll find something to suit you needs.

Speaking on behalf of the other side of the fence. She'll grow out of it. It's just a phase. If my folks were as "concerned" as you come off to be I'd be in a jail cell right now. I learned from my mistakes on my own. You can't force your daughter to learn or to do wot you feel is right thing. Some things have to be learned by doing. Wot she needs is support and the knowledge that you will be there for her.
 
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And there's always the low-tech approach.
"Hi, how's it going, anything you feel like talking about?"

On the other hand, if she finds out about your monitoring--or even suspects it--she'll clam up, become suspicious of you, and probably be more careful in the future.
 
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And there are many daughters and sons that go missing because their parents were not concerned enough. While I agree with the question of your username, sounds more like someone wanting to spy on their girlfriend or their friends than a concerned father, but maybe you are legit. The best way is confronting her right up front about it, but also remember that girls, especially girls, begin to want their privacy at a younger age than guys do. It's a part of growing up. You have to make that call.. is it normal growing up type of stuff, or is there real reason to be concerned?
 
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Desolate One

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Murlyn said:
While I agree with the question of your username, sounds more like someone wanting to spy on their girlfriend or their friends than a concerned father, but maybe you are legit.


I didn't want to say it! I feel I'm too new. ;)
 
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Desolate One said:
I didn't want to say it! I feel I'm too new. ;)
same here, though there are many options, freeware and shareware softwares are available
 

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Being a parent and a grand parent. I think the best approach. Is to sit down have heart to heart talk. She may open up or may not, but it would be good to always have the door of communication open to her.
 
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here here, I do wonder what age she is...
 
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deathdealler

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Wow.. i got more information on how to be a father than information on keystroke recorders.

for some reason my name suggests that I could not be a father hmm strange, I suppose it was the first thing that came to me.

Any way I'm not the greatest with computers and searched the Internet for free keystroke recorders for the mac, some said free but was not free a big runaround. I don't want to purchase something that I will only use for a couple of weeks to asses a situation.
I really don't want to get to personal about my situation but if any of you have great teen kid that STOPS TALKING TO YOU out of the blue I think you might understand.

I would appreciate some serious help.

thanks DD
 
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Desolate One

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All we're trying to express to you is that there are better ways to find out wot's going on with your daughter then to cross that line of trust and flat out spy on her. As was said before, if you want this lack of communication to continue, then by all means disrespect her privacy and pry all you want. I know you're worried and concerned for her well being but perhaps she's not aware you're there to listen. Make her aware, it's the best option in this situation.
By the way, where's her mother whilst this is going on? Perhaps it's a womanly "issue"?
 
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****, why stop there, why not just tap the phone line? There are many programs you can use to actually record any call that comes into the house. There are also programs that can hack (illegally) websites like Hotmail and yahoo for password retrieval. This only works though if you dont care if the person's password gets changed. Because once you hack it, it will ask you to reset the password to something new. One a side note, no one ever has a guide to understanding your children. She will try drugs, she will try alcohol, she will have sex within her lifetime(shocking I know). Your best bet is to be there for her when she makes mistakes in order to help her realize that no matter what, you'll be there for her. You never had underage sex? You never drank, smoked, did drugs as a teen? I think parents these days try and be too protective over their kids and when their kids begin to try and experiment with life outside the house, their parents always fear the worst and start going to extremes. If you raised her right, it'll work out fine. She'll always have that foundation to rely on. Check out websnoop and http://www.kengolf.com/en/
 
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"I really don't want to get to personal about my situation but if any of you have great teen kid that STOPS TALKING TO YOU out of the blue I think you might understand."

Isn't that all teen kids?
 
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I agree, that's most all teens, and I know that when I was a teen, if I found my parents doing what you are suggesting, it would be a whole lot longer before I ever talked to them again.. a lot longer than if they did as rman and others have suggested. It's a horrible horrible risk that you are thinking about taking, one that can have very lasting effects if gone wrong.

And I completely disagree with the statement about parents being too protective of their kids these days. I think it's the complete opposite and I applaud you for trying to do something, but snooping on her is the wrong something. There are so many reasons we are saying this and you do seem to truly care about your daughter and her welfare, so please at least entertain what we are saying.
 
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Murlyn said:
I agree, that's most all teens, and I know that when I was a teen, if I found my parents doing what you are suggesting, it would be a whole lot longer before I ever talked to them again.. a lot longer than if they did as rman and others have suggested. It's a horrible horrible risk that you are thinking about taking, one that can have very lasting effects if gone wrong.

And I completely disagree with the statement about parents being too protective of their kids these days. I think it's the complete opposite and I applaud you for trying to do something, but snooping on her is the wrong something. There are so many reasons we are saying this and you do seem to truly care about your daughter and her welfare, so please at least entertain what we are saying.

I agree, parents today are most often not protective enough, its good that youre paying attention and not just seeing it as 'shes a kid, what does she have to worry about'. as many do. but be cautious in how you approach her, spying is never the answer. and knowing she can discuss things with you will help your relationship in more ways than you know.
 
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not overprotective enough? Isnt he talking about bugging his daughter to find out what she's doing? That's not overprotective? I should have worded that better. More and more parents dont give a **** and the ones that do care are almost always overprotective with their kids.
 
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If your daughter knows the system like I know mine, any software of the kind would be discovered in a second. Just a thought.
 
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V

vuschejan

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Texasmeat said:
****, why stop there, why not just tap the phone line? There are many programs you can use to actually record any call that comes into the house. There are also programs that can hack (illegally) websites like Hotmail and yahoo for password retrieval. This only works though if you dont care if the person's password gets changed. Because once you hack it, it will ask you to reset the password to something new. One a side note, no one ever has a guide to understanding your children. She will try drugs, she will try alcohol, she will have sex within her lifetime(shocking I know). Your best bet is to be there for her when she makes mistakes in order to help her realize that no matter what, you'll be there for her. You never had underage sex? You never drank, smoked, did drugs as a teen? I think parents these days try and be too protective over their kids and when their kids begin to try and experiment with life outside the house, their parents always fear the worst and start going to extremes. If you raised her right, it'll work out fine. She'll always have that foundation to rely on. Check out websnoop and http://www.kengolf.com/en/

I completley disagree with this. I'm 15 (male) and I've never done drugs, only seen them twice(One at a dave Matthews Concert, The other on my bus) I'm definitley not having premaritial sex, and to even draw the line further on that, to keep from accidently slipping to that i've drawn a line before open mouth kissing. Dont say that we WILL do it when some of us dont.
 
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D

Desolate One

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vuschejan said:
I completley disagree with this. I'm 15 (male) and I've never done drugs, only seen them twice(One at a dave Matthews Concert, The other on my bus) I'm definitley not having premaritial sex, and to even draw the line further on that, to keep from accidently slipping to that i've drawn a line before open mouth kissing. Dont say that we WILL do it when some of us dont.

But of course. And when I was your age (**** I must be getting old, I used "your age"!) I had never fathomed the thought of any of that either. Things change my friend, peeple change. You've barely began to experience life. When you come back 10 years hense to prove us all wrong, you've nothing to claim but a statistic. The average "child" these days don't draw lines. And if you stand true to those lines you've drawn then I applaud you. But not now, not tomorrow, but after all is said and done.
 
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Texasmeat said:
not overprotective enough? Isnt he talking about bugging his daughter to find out what she's doing? That's not overprotective? I should have worded that better. More and more parents dont give a **** and the ones that do care are almost always overprotective with their kids.
this is pretty much what I meant, but I think its better for a parent to be overprotective than be oblivious to their child.
 
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vuschejan said:
I completley disagree with this. I'm 15 (male) and I've never done drugs, only seen them twice(One at a dave Matthews Concert, The other on my bus) I'm definitley not having premaritial sex, and to even draw the line further on that, to keep from accidently slipping to that i've drawn a line before open mouth kissing. Dont say that we WILL do it when some of us dont.

vuschejan, good for you! I do applaud you today and encourage you to hold your ground. Don't let anyone tell you that you're too young to draw a line and stick with it. The earlier that lines are drawn, the easier it will be to stay on "your side" of it. (I imagine that you already know that and have been doing it for years.) If we had more teenagers (and adults) that had the courage and will power to even attempt to draw a line, this country would be much better off. Keep it up, you will be rewarded.

I'm going out on a limb here… I bet you even respect your elders :)
 

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