Hello, I am using Terminal to set up and auto bcc address to my wife on our business account. I am using:

defaults write com.apple.mail UserHeaders '{"bcc"="mywife@example.com";}'

What is the code in Terminal when I want to add {except when "To"="mywife@example.com"} so that when I send an email to her directly, that she doesn't get it twice

Anyone know?